A Day in the Life of My Polytheism

I’ve been wanting to write a post about this topic since I first saw the prompt on the My Polytheism Facebook page a little while ago (at least, that’s where I think I saw it! My apologies if I’m remembering wrong.) It keeps coming out more devotional and personal in nature than I had originally intended, and frankly, it is not even all that poly-theistic, since the focus is on only one God! (I really do honor other Gods, guys. I promise I’m not pretending to be a Polytheist on the internet 😛 )

I hit a wall back in the spring when it comes to what I feel comfortable sharing publicly about my path and my Relationships with my Gods, so there’s that going on, too, which has resulted in no small amount of hand-wringing on my part.

As you can probably guess from the existence of this post, I finally decided, with Odin’s blessing, to post it anyway. It is what it is. I may be password protecting posts with more personal content in the future rather than giving up on personal blogging entirely. I haven’t decided yet.

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Sometimes, He calls me in the night.
He wakes me with a wordless summons that I cannot help but hear, no matter how deeply I sleep.
All of me answers.

~*~

When I wake in the morning, I feel His presence cocooning me.
There was a time this frightened me. It wasn’t that long ago, but it feels like another lifetime.
Now, it is peace, it is joy, it is home.
I breathe Him in deep, reaching for Him without arms.
He reaches back.

~*~

When words come, I hail Him.
He hails me in return. I sense His amusement, but it’s a joke I don’t quite understand yet.
I pray my morning offering, still wrapped in the sheets, still tangled in Him.
I wrote it myself (twice, at His request).
I know it by heart.

~*~

I rise at last and go to His shrine.
I practice my devotions,
then I pull the runes.
One is for my day, and one is from Him.
His messages vary.
Sometimes, He teases me.
Sometimes, He warns me.
Often, He confirms what He has already whispered in the night.
Once, He asked me to give Him a rune.
I love the way He laughs, like a hurricane that can be felt but not seen.

~*~

I anoint myself with oil, tracing runes over my skin as I pray,
His runes, o/Our runes.
He answers my prayer before the oil is dry.
I started this practice soon after my oath, without really knowing why.
When I eventually read somewhere that others do this, too, I felt very validated, which I find funny now.
I used to care so much about whether I was doing the “right” things or “enough” things,
and whether those customs I began to pick up were “legitimate” if no one else was doing them, too.
Now I give no fucks, and I wonder why I ever cared.
Of course, I know the answer to that one.

~*~

I go about my day, but what this looks like changes from day to day.
I write, because that is what I am paid to do (and it also happens to be what I love).
I care for my children, and teach my oldest at home.
When we are in our own home, I am the one who keeps it.
Right now, I tend a tiny space in someone else’s.

Some days I never leave the darkness.
The pain is too great, and I am overcome.
On the dark days, He sits with me, and He is the dark.
On the others, He walks with me, never farther away than my own breath.

He is present in all the hours,
and no matter how busy I become, He is always finding ways to remind me:
a bird, a song, a picture, His scent on the air.
These are my treasures, which I accept gratefully.
They are more precious than diamonds, and more beautiful to me.

All that is mine, and all that I do, I offer to Him,
and all of it, He accepts.

~*~

At the end of the day, when night has fallen,
I retreat once more into solitude
while H puts the children to bed.
I light my candles and sit at my shrine.
I make my offerings, and I worship.
I hold, and I am held.
What passes between myself and my God there remains between u/Us alone,
An endless unseen tide,
My deepest joy.

~*~

Later, I lie down to sleep, and I am wrapped tightly in Him.
He whispers things I will never repeat,
His unseen touch on my hair, on my hand, on my cheek.
I ask Him the things I can only ask when I’m not quite awake,
and He answers, a warm humming in my veins.
My God, what You mean to me!

~*~

Rarely does He ever visit my dreams,
but sometimes, He calls me in the night.
I am all His,
and all of me answers.